⊹ Ancestral revolution words ꩜

I can not hide myself anymore behind:

◇ a always smiling face & joking around

◇ good looking, expensive outfits

◇ complaining

◇ being busy & doing doing doing

◇ a closed heart towards men

◇ being jealous towards sisters

◇ focusing on others & not showing myself authentically

◇ a strong muscle body

◇ being rich

◇ being the victim

My dear Grandmother, I can see & feel the pain behind your good looking mask. I see that you, as the oldest slibling, had to be the strong one during war & therefore suppress your own needs.
My dear Mother, behind your complaining, I can see & feel your wish to be loved and seen by Men and foremost - by your father + yourself.
My dear Father, behind your jokes, I can see that your mother rarely took your needs seriously.

I can’t play this game anymore. Even if I don’t know the exact new way. It hurts too much to stay in the old. I choose to recognize the patterns I took over and find a new way to express myself. I can no longer suppress the pain - it comes out anyway. I choose to care for myself. I consciously seek help from therapists, to support me feeling safer in my body, while being on this wild journey.

I feel the call towards revolution.

Reborn from the ashes.

An old ancestral cycle dies & a new cycle begins.

I am not hiding anymore.

Sherin